Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
