so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize