will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize