She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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