He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
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