Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
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