Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
