dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
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