Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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