i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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