just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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