I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Randomize
