ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
