I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
