I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
