so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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