i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
