Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
