Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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