Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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