I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there