the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
