Are we in a gay sports bar?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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