I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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