actually, I'm a sock model
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
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