She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
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once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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