So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
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I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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