So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
im holly from the hills drunk
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize