also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
