Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I need a burrito and a hug.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
