hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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