i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
