I wannas sexs uuuuu
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize