Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
