I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
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