he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize