Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize