Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
