he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
