people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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