Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Randomize
