somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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