I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
