I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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