Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
My Higher Power is John Stamos
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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