If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
