i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
