butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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