To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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