Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
FUCK WHALES
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