if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Randomize
