Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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